crentes rebelde

1. Crentes rebelde lá no céu não pode ir
Believers! The unruly can’t go to heaven up there.

This is a very learned hymn, surely composed under some higher inspiration. As such, the very first verse can strike the undiscerning ear as dubious, since it can be understood as suffering from the grave sin of lack of concordance. "Unruly believers," the bard seem to say, with the first word in the plural, but the second in the singular number. This difficulty is, however, easily corrected, since the first word of the hymn is actually a vocative, "o believers!", and the next one the subject of the verb. This obvious interpretation is, indeed, corroborated by the fact that the mere suggestion that there would ever be cause to speak of more than one unruly believer is preposterous, and so the singular is to be preferred. Worthy of attention too, gentle reader, is this deictic immediacy in up there, as if extending the hands to the Unbounded Above. Sublime.

Essa doutrina nos ensina assim,
That doctrine so doth us teach

What doctrine is it, one could ask. It is the very doctrine of the previous verse. Therefore the doctrine that the unruly can’t go to heaven up there teaches itself by itself, the very primum mobile by which our hymn starts. Perish the thought of this being a sorry example of tautology.

Crentes rebelde lá no céu não vai subir.
Believers! The unruly will not go to heaven up there.

Wrapping the ring that is this first stanza, the bard reminds us, in quite a timely fashion, of what has being said just a verse ago. In this instance, however, there are some crucial differences: in the first stanza the unruly could not (não pode) go to heaven, as a matter of Aristotelian δύναμις dúnamis , potenciality; this time the unruly will not (não vai) go to heaven, concerning the ἐντελέχεια entelékʰeia , the actuality, surely because this wise doctrine has already been established in the poetical realm we have just been fortunate to penetrate. Moreover, instead of going (ir) as before, this time our sorry unruly fellow won’t ascend (subir) to heaven. This makes clear the upwards motion involved in going to heaven, even though this constitutes only the negative knowledge of what will not be the case.

2. De minissaia lá no céu não pode ir,
From a mini-skirt one can’t go to heaven up there,

In the recording there is a detail that could pass unnoticed by the untrained ear. Instead of pronouncing de with an affricate consonant, as it is usual in Brazilian Portuguese, in a way that sounds like how jee would in English, the singers are careful to pronounce the word with a plain dental occlusive, like dee in English, as they burst into song. The undiscerning could conjecturate that this is just due to the differences in regional pronunciation in Brazil, but another interpretation is inevitable. Affrication is made by means of friction, and friction, it is well-known, produces heat, and heat is associated with coitus and concupiscence, besides being a known quality of hell itself. By avoiding the affricate consonant and using the pure occlusive instead, our singers suggest to us the purity of heaven, evoking even the other dental occlusives like in the Latin deus, or the Ancient Greek θεός. Such is the mastery we have in front of us.

Now to the meaning. De might either mean ‘with’ or ‘from’. What to choose isn’t completely evident: if we take the meaning as ‘with’, that would suggest that one can’t go to heaven while wearing a mini-skirt. As far as my bibliographical powers could ascertain, indeed, there is no record of people going to heaven while wearing such apparel. Likewise, if we favour it as meaning ‘from’, we are bound to understand that no one can go to heaven having a mini-skirt as the starting point of the trajectory. Since no conventional mini-skirt has the room to host a trebuchet of sufficient size for that feat, that is an acceptable meaning. One could say, with Saint Thomas Aquinas, that if a cow can fly if God so willed, so could one be dragged to heaven from a mini-skirt. That is true, but since the realm of the impossible doesn’t apply to god, the verse can’t be dealing with that, but only of what is possible outside divine providence.

Não vou usar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir.

3. De unhas pintada lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou pintar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

intermezzo

4. Crentes rebelde lá no céu não pode ir,
Essa doutrina nos ensina assim,
Crentes rebelde lá no céu não vai subir,

5. Quem usa saia-calça lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou usar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

6. Com correntinha lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou usar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

intermezzo

7. Crentes rebelde lá no céu não pode ir,
Essa doutrina nos ensina assim,
Crentes rebelde lá no céu não vai subir,

8. De cabelo curto lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou cortar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

9.Quem usa brinco lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou usar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

intermezzo

10. Crentes rebelde lá no céu não pode ir,
Essa doutrina nos ensina assim,
Crentes rebelde lá no céu não vai subir,

11. De maquiagem lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou usar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

12. O mentiroso lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou mentir porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

intermezzo

13. Crentes rebelde lá no céu não pode ir,
Essa doutrina nos ensina assim,
Crentes rebelde lá no céu não vai subir,

14. O preguiçoso lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou ser porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

15. O orgulhoso lá no céu não pode ir,
Não vou ser porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

intermezzo

16. Crentes rebelde lá no céu não pode ir,
Essa doutrina nos ensina assim,
Crentes rebelde lá no céu não vai subir,

17. Quem fala mal do seu irmão não pode ir,
Não vou falar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

18. Quem fala mal do seu pastor não pode ir,
Não vou falar porque eu quero subir,
Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,

Eu quero ir, com Jesus quero subir,